Proper hazing to welcome Andrew Alberts & Tom Kostopoulos to the Canes

My boy Jimmy has come through with some clutch signings in the month of July with Erik Cole and Chad LaRose both returning. But today I welcome in D-man Andrew Alberts and forward Tom Kostopoulos to Carolina the only way I know how: by making fun of them.

To Tommy the Greek Kostopoulos: First off - you sound great and I vaguely remember you as a Hab. My boys from FHF dig you so that goes a long way. But I'm concerned that living and playing in the South around all these fun bars and nice women's fashion stores may drive you to be an accomplice to more purse thefts. Yes I know that HE didn't steal the purse that night in Tampa Bay, but hey - guilt by association when something as embarrassing as that happens.

So you're a prankster, eh? Is someone going to have to lock you in your hotel room every time the Canes play Lightning in Tampa?

What the hell is going on with your last name? The letter "O" makes an appearance like 8 freaking times. But it is easy to come up with nicknames with a name like that. It happened spontaneously at 850 the Buzz's post about him today. I'm still fond of my Flight of the Conchords reference; "They call me the Hip-Hop-Kostopoulos, my lyrics are bottomless". So uh, yeah welcome aboard. Do good, please.

To Andrew Alberts: It took a minute, but I figured out why I remembered him:

Of course! He's the one that Scott Walker looked up a foot to and still beat his ass. But he's a hitter and someone who's finally a "defensive" defenseman. There hasn't been a d-man acquisition in a long time that was "D" first in Carolina, it seems. What is it like having two first names? At least those two aren't "Harry" and "Dick". Alberts can join in the "dude, I know how that feels" fun whenever someone has another gruesome injury on the Hurricanes this year: (from his Boston days, apparently)
Pretty kickass July. Nice weather, fun weekends and the band is back together with a good fresh beat added in. Well done, Jimmy Boy.

The Canes can make the playoffs again if...

(image via Flickr's Kaatiya)

Some of them are saying that this will finally be the year that the Hurricanes make it back to the postseason, while others are still not convinced. After giving it some thought, I'm still undecided on what to expect from this year's team. The past two seasons have seen squads loaded with talent that either couldn't play because of injury or perhaps because of complacence.

I see the Canes being either Division Champs or at least playoff-bound again IF they can avoid their evil twin named "Slackass".

Don't remember him? Let me remind you:

December 12, 2008. Ottawa Senators are in Raleigh to take on the Canes. The Sens were still the hottest team in hockey and hadn't completely dismantled themselves yet. Carolina was coming off of a rather mediocre streak. They played at the Bell Centre in Montreal to remind themselves how to win. Less than 24 hours later, they had to play the eventual SC Champion Red Wings in Detroit and lost 5-2 (but sort of played them respectively).

So in comes OTT on the homecoming for the Hurricanes and instead of playing tough, they let the Sens walk all over them and it led to bloggers posting stuff like this:

East of Here's: Just What Am I Paying For?

and Caniacs in general either drank the sorrows away that night or cried in their collective pillows.

Fast forward a month. The NY Islanders are in the RBC Center. With the exception of Samsonov joining the team, January has sucked for the Canes as they are still losing to teams they can take craps bigger than. The Isles squad manages to score all 3 of their first goals on shorties. It's a NYI record. Outstanding. And D-Lee noted that two of them were on the same Carolina power play. Wade Dubielewicz (and his imposing stature) allows 3 Hurricanes goals but stands on his head to make 44 of 47 saves in a 6-3 win. Pathetic.

---

Unfortunately, there are a number of other games that I could have chosen to reference. If the Hurricanes can avoid games like those - they'll hopefully find themselves in a position where they don't have to win their final game of the season to make the playoffs.

File it under "D" for "Duh"

Tuomo Ruutu has the line from this week's "In other news, water is wet" department after Friday's 7-1 drubbing of Atlanta:

"All the time we were talking about shooting the puck," Ruutu said. "We did
tonight, and that's why we got those goals. If you don't shoot, you're not going
to get goals."