In other news , John Grahame kicked out of KHL?

Listen, anytime you bring up the topic of John Grahame - people seem to jump at it from all angles to either pile on or praise him. In what unofficially became the post for his secret fan club, this one had folks coming back near every time the former Canes goalie won a game in the KHL this year to comment and inform.

So here's your update Grahame lovers/haters:

Things aren't looking so good for Crackers and his future playing career after this blurb shows up today in my inbox:

"More trouble for Avangard Omsk"

"Yesterday near the club “Atlantid” Grahame was noticed in an intoxicated state, after which a police squad arrived and took him to a detoxification center. Club president Konstantin Potapov and Avangard general manger Anatoli Bardin came shortly after to collect him from there. Later from a source in the club came information that the management of the Hawks is going to terminate the contract with the hockey player. Another option that is not ruled out is the possibility of trading the player. The press service of the club has not yet officially commented on the situation."- Russian site, Sports Planet

So let me get this right.. a man can't even get drunk in a bar anymore without losing his job? What's this world coming to?

Strange news as the Russian translation is so vague on the description of events. Was Grahame just seen drunk and buzzed? Was he found passed out face down on the sidewalk outside the club? Did he almost Jimi Hendrix/Jim Morrison himself?

I'm not sure what exactly went down, but I do know that he hasn't been playing well - and the team finding out that he's piss-drunk and being arrested to detox would get just about anyone dismissed from any pro hockey team. This one here hopes he can get his act together to at least make a decent back-up goaltender in the NHL one day. Perhaps he could consult current River Rat Dan LaCouture - who gave up alcohol for the betterment of his personal life and hockey career.

After all, if you can't handle your liquor - you shouldn't be drinking in the first place.

h/t Beyond the Blueshirts

John Grahame loses Avangard Omsk debut

Johnny Grahame didn't get off to a great start with his new Russian club, falling 4-2. Oh well Crackers, at least you didn't get a penalty for "attack an opponent not holding the hockey". Jaromir Jagr was even on the +/- column. No word on whether or not he's still Mr. Personality in the post-game interviews.

Google translation of KHL game stats. Ak Bars 4, Avangard Omsk 2.

Irony at it's finest: Babchuk leaves Avangard Omsk to join the Hurricanes near the same day in July where John Grahame leaves the 'Canes to join the Hawks in the KHL. Здравствуйте (which apparently is "Hello" in Russian) and goooooodbye Grahame.

The Canes can make the playoffs again if...

(image via Flickr's Kaatiya)

Some of them are saying that this will finally be the year that the Hurricanes make it back to the postseason, while others are still not convinced. After giving it some thought, I'm still undecided on what to expect from this year's team. The past two seasons have seen squads loaded with talent that either couldn't play because of injury or perhaps because of complacence.

I see the Canes being either Division Champs or at least playoff-bound again IF they can avoid their evil twin named "Slackass".

Don't remember him? Let me remind you:

December 12, 2008. Ottawa Senators are in Raleigh to take on the Canes. The Sens were still the hottest team in hockey and hadn't completely dismantled themselves yet. Carolina was coming off of a rather mediocre streak. They played at the Bell Centre in Montreal to remind themselves how to win. Less than 24 hours later, they had to play the eventual SC Champion Red Wings in Detroit and lost 5-2 (but sort of played them respectively).

So in comes OTT on the homecoming for the Hurricanes and instead of playing tough, they let the Sens walk all over them and it led to bloggers posting stuff like this:

East of Here's: Just What Am I Paying For?

and Caniacs in general either drank the sorrows away that night or cried in their collective pillows.

Fast forward a month. The NY Islanders are in the RBC Center. With the exception of Samsonov joining the team, January has sucked for the Canes as they are still losing to teams they can take craps bigger than. The Isles squad manages to score all 3 of their first goals on shorties. It's a NYI record. Outstanding. And D-Lee noted that two of them were on the same Carolina power play. Wade Dubielewicz (and his imposing stature) allows 3 Hurricanes goals but stands on his head to make 44 of 47 saves in a 6-3 win. Pathetic.

---

Unfortunately, there are a number of other games that I could have chosen to reference. If the Hurricanes can avoid games like those - they'll hopefully find themselves in a position where they don't have to win their final game of the season to make the playoffs.

In praise of Casey Borer

At a time in last season, the Hurricanes were struggling to muster up any kind of good consistent effort. As they were "circling the drain", forwards and defenseman alike were dropping like flies due to either injury or the "Bucket in front of you - while you're stuck on the toilet - and losing 12 lbs. for 3 days" flu that struck the whole team.

One bright spot among that rather crap-tacular period was the call-up of Albany River Rat and St. Cloud State alum, Casey Borer. There was something about him that Caniac Nation immediately approved of. I myself, was just happy to see team management give someone else a shot. The D-corps seemed either tired, complacent or too old if they weren't on the shelf due to injury/flu.

In eleven games on the Carolina bench, Borer registered 2 assists and 1 goal (I won't forget seeing Roddy Brind'amour go down and snatch the puck up for Casey's souvenir). He may have been a -3, but his 6 goal, 13 assist and +19 in 61 Albany games seem to suggest he's defensively sound enough to cover up for any potential flaws in his game.

In March, Casey was playing a game against the Syracuse Crunch when this happened:
"It was the start of the period, and they didn't let the ice freeze," Borer said. "I was carrying the puck up and it got stuck in the water, and I kind of twisted back for it with my torso, and my knees didn't come with me. The guy was already lining up to hit me, and I was in a vulnerable position. My knee must have been exposed, and we just got twisted up weird." - Wikipedia

Assuming that he can make a full recovery, I'd be surprised if Borer is not a part of the 3rd line D-pairing for the Canes come October.

Besides, with John Grahame banished signing to play in Russia - who is there on the team for the stalkers? Casey has had at least one fan girl vowing for his love since his college days:

The First Annual C.O.I. Awards Banquet!

Well, the NHL season is officially over. So what's there to talk about? Not much, I guess. The draft is coming up, but I'm just not ready to get all into that yet. "Why not?", you may ask. Well, it's because there's something more important that we must do first.You see, the NHL awards banquet just happened and there were plenty of awards and accolades to be handed out. Sure, we all knew that the Ovenchicken would get plenty of trophies. And we knew that Lidtrom would get some hardware. But that's just the tip of the iceberg. Because, as you may not know, there is one more awards event that doesn't get nearly as much publicity as it should: It is our very own Carolina On Ice [TM] Awards.

Yes, the Wuff and I have been busy nominating and voting on those very special players who, in our eyes, deserve recognition for those qualities that make them special. The votes have been cast. The numbers have been tallied (nearly every award was won by a vote count of 2-0). And the results are in. So without further ado, I give you the first annual C.O.I. Awards!

You've all heard of the "Lester Pearson" award, which is given to the top player as selected by the NHLPA. Well, at C.O.I., we have the "Mo Lester Person" Award:

It is given to the player with the worst mullet. Since this is the inaugural year, we decided that this award should not be limited to the current year, but should go to the worst mullet in all of the hockey historical record. To set a benchmark, of sorts. So, without further ado, the winner is: [drumroll please]

Jaromir Jagr! Yes, there were some other truly deserving mullets out there to choose from. But when I realized that he was a dead ringer for 2/3 of the girls in my (mid '80's) high school yearbooks, I knew we had our winner. Nice bangs, jackass...

Ahem... Moving on, you are no doubt familiar with the "Masterson" Award, which the NHL gives to the player who illustrates perserverence to the sport of hockey. Well, we here at C.O.I. have commissioned the "Bastard Son" Award. It could only go to one person this year: Sean Avery.

Now, the "BS" Award is not given for perserverence. Rather, it is for the person who thinks he is a hot dog; but is instead, merely a weiner. I'd post a picture of Mr. Avery, but why would I do that to our loyal readers? I wouldn't.

Now, our next award may take a little explaining. As you all know, the "Vezina" trophy is always given to Martin Brodeur. Or at least it seems that way lately. Anyway, it is for the best goaltender. However, here at C.O.I., instead of the "Vezina" award, we give the "Vagina" award:

It goes to the biggest [well, you know...] in the NHL. We fought over this award (both the design and the winner) long and hard [pun fully intended]. We agreed relatively quickly, that the winner would be Jack "I won't play for Carolina" Johnson. But we couldn't agree on what form the trophy should take. I wanted a golden baby. Wuff wanted a golden kitten. But then, we compromised on a vibrator. It only made sense, as Johnson and the vibrator both have something in common. They are both stuck up twats.

The next NHL award that is near and dear to Caniacs is the "Selke" Award, which is given to the best defensive forward. Our very own Rod Brind'amour has dominated this award lately. But here at C.O.I., we have the "Sucky" award. Also known as the Lindy Ruff Award. It goes to the whiniest, most annoying bitch in hockey:

This year's award goes to Olli Jokinen; for his outstanding achievement in the art of whining about diving. In fact, his whining act was so good this year, it actually affected the officiating in at least one game, and maybe two. The balloting for this award wasn't even close. Ole Whiny Jokinen's crying was so good/bad this year, we nearly went ahead and gave it to him for next year as well. But we didn't, because we figured he'd whine about that too, if we did.

The NHL also gives out the "Norris" Trophy. This goes to the best Defenseman in the league. What do we here at C.O.I. think? Big whoop. Who cares about Pronger, Chara, Lidstrom, some other random mutant, ... etc. They've got nothing on Chad Larose - the winner of C.O.I.'s "Chuck Norris" Trophy:

But be careful Chad, the Chuck Norris Trophy must be kept seperate from any other trophies. It has been known to eat them, and crap little aluminum bullets. It is that bad ass...

And last, but certainly not least... There is another NHL award that is closely connected with the Hurricanes. It is the "Lady Byng" award for gentlemanly play. Ronnie Francis has a couple of these in his collection. But we just couldn't bring ourselves to reward gentlemanly play. Rather, we thought we'd come up with an award for work ethic. But being motivated slackers, we decided it'd be more appropriate if we came up with an award not for work ethic; but rather a lack thereof. An award for the player that best exemplifies the attitude of "I don't care if my save percentage is lower than Roger Clemens' batting average; I'm skipping practice and heading to the strip club!" So, we created the "Bada Byng" Award.

And this year's winner is: [dramatic music please]

The Russian League's newest backup goalie - John Grahame!

So anyways, thank you for tuning in for this special presentation of the first Annual C.O.I. Awards Banquet. We hope you enjoyed the show as much as we enjoyed bringing it to you. Be sure to tune in next week when Wuffy comes back from vacation and realizes that I've posted both a picture of a vibrator and the word "twat" in the same post. Mayhem ensues...

Just why am I watching Dancing With The Stars?

As the wife and I were chatting over dinner and DWTS last night, I noticed a close up on Mr. Bret Yamaguchi Hedican.

Mrs. Wuffie: "You only watch this show because they show him on it."
Wuffie: "Nuh-uh. OK, well maybe it has something to do with it. He's the only Canes player I've been able to see live on TV in what seems like forever over a month. And the guy that dances with Kristi sorta looks like the Latin American version of Chad LaRose."

So what if Hedican is probably not coming back. He has been an integral part of the Hurricanes for a good chunk of his career and is to be wished well in his future and health. But is it just me or is anyone else shocked how bald Bret really is? Maybe its the studio lights on ABC, but his head really seems to shine as I'm used to seeing his helmet cover up. Do you think he told the NY Times editors to crop the family picture so that it wouldn't be so obvious in this photo?

Aside: Farewell to Johnny Grahame, who signed with the coolest sounding Russian team today - Omsk Avangard. Just say it, "Omsk". That may be close to the sound I made while putting my hands-in-face watching him play goalie for the Canes. If anything, you've been fun to witness and ridicule during your time in Carolina. But good luck to you and stuff. Don't let any of the Russian coaches Tortarella you.

Canes at Devils: Thank goodness for alternative programming

I took the wife out last night for a nice dinner right around 7:00, scheduled to come back in and catch the game on the DVR. As it was apparently the night of every Raleigh high school's Winterfest/Sadie Hawkins and all the restaurants were overrun with dressed up teens, we didn't make it back home until 9:30ish.
As I watched the first trimester, it became obvious early that the Canes had returned to their lackluster form and displayed why the NHL's worst penalty killing team owns that tag. And this less than 24 hours after a confidence boosting and much-needed win over Washington that propelled them back up to the SE Division lead.
What's with Cam Ward being "Tortarella'd" last night? Obviously he was being hung out to dry, and stopping breakaways aren't his thing, but damn you'd think after three early ones it's time for a change no? Crackers saw his first action since being recalled from Albany and didn't allow any further.
Needless to say, let's be glad they didn't put on this kind of crap at a home game. As much as this team needs the revenue from butts in the seats at home, performances like this are simply killing the team this season. How many games now has it been where they get shelled like that? Just be glad they didn't make it 8 goals like the Buffaslugs did earlier this year. But for every one solid and sound game the Canes have had this year, there is another where the effort just isn't present.
Eric Staal has picked a hell of time in the season to be on a cold streak. Although he shined in ATL at the All-Star game as the MVP, he can't seem to create any goals without Malkin or Brian Campbell out on the ice with him.
So after the debauchery that was that 1st period, I could simply watch the game in ultra fast forward and wait to see the goals light up. Nothing did. Not a game worth wasting a Saturday night watching.
There were some other things worth watching last night however. The SNL repeat of Feist performing live came on. Leslie Feist, who IMHO has the sexiest voice in music, is Canada's finest and performed their iPod commercial super hit, "1,2,3,4" followed by "Feel It All". This band is extremely talented and performed at or above their potential. (Take the hint Canes).

Here they are performing "Feel It All" acoustically from the Jimmy Kimmel show:

Will JR resort to "The Arturs Irbe" treatment?

Since mid-November, nearly every game recap you read mentioned that the Hurricanes "are now 2-8-1 in their last..." or something similar. Throw those figures out. The boys lost to arguably the worst team in all of hockey last night while also losing their Southeast division lead.

Everyone has their ideas as to why such a talented team is struggling so badly.

Injuries - sure the Canes have been hit hard again this season with injuries. Per The N&O:

"The Hurricanes have now lost 148 man-games to injury, on pace to exceed last season's total of 250 and approach the 2005-06 mark of 267."

Coach Laviolette is correct with his "no excuses" approach to blaming injuries. Anyone remember what this team did that 05-06 season?

Goaltending - Overheard from co-blogger East of Here - Cam Ward, despite a strong start - has been referred to as a not-so-flattering "Cam Weekes". Strong sometimes, very fluky at others. However, it matters not who is in goal when the NHL's worst defense and penalty kill hang their goaltender out to dry.

Management - For all the wonderful things my boy Jimmy has done here, a killer right now are the amount of no-trade clauses within the Canes contract players. A large portion of players who come to Raleigh love living here and want to stay. Were these NTC's issued as a way to keep the players happy or a method of offering smaller figures in contract negotiations?

Complacency - This is the silver bullet, IMO. There is absolutely no excuse for a professional athlete to "take nights off". Arturs Irbe had a great finishing touch on his long career in the NHL with Carolina, backstopping the team to the Stanley Cup Finals in 2002. Next season after that? He's paid his full NHL level contract to play in the ECHL.

This team used to live by the slogan "Whatever It Takes". Is the Arturs Irbe treatment what it will take to get this team heading in the right direction? John Grahame was put on waivers, sent to the River Rats supposedly to "set an example". He feels that it was a slap in the face. What's more important here? - hurting a players feelings or doing whatever it takes to win?

Leighton Will Battle Ward

Whoah Whoah Whoah guys, we meant battle for the goaltending position

See ya Crackers. It's been fun, exciting, a long time coming.

What To Do With An Extra Half Hour Before The Game

Canes square off at home against the Sens with a rare 1/2 hour to kill - 7:30 start. We here at COI thoroughly enjoy a weeknight tailgate just as much as anybody does, but what are we to do with the extra time? Here's a few ideas.

1. Drink a few more $1.50 beverages as opposed to $7.50.
2. Grill your own burgers as opposed to buying the delicious $6 Hardee's Thickburger.
3. Spend a few extra minutes doing your hair before leaving the house.
4. Make sure your seat is nice and warm.
5. Go to K-Mart and buy a $30 jersey instead of the $200 one at The Eye.
6. See suggestion #1.

Looking At Leighton: Puppies & Babies, Oh My!

Great reads about Albany goaltender & Hurricanes prospect, Michael Leighton.

Montreal Canadiens Goaltenders

N&O - Leighton Leaves An Impression

The fans make it possible for John Grahame to be paid that $1.6 million. If those same fans are clamoring for this guy to be called up to replace Crackers, why can't their wishes be heard? Granted, without an injury to Ward or Grahame, he would have to clear re-entry waivers - which wouldn't happen the way he's been playing. But just look at this guy!


How can you look at those puppy dog eyes and not feel sorry for him? Come on, Come on! He's been passed around the leagues like Anson Carter - one of these days - he'll hopefully be doing some solid goaltending for one lucky team.

The Sit-ee-ashun In Goal This Weekend

Mer got me going on this over at Paperwhites In Season this morning.

An interesting dilemma here for the goal tandem this week:

Tampa Bay Thursday - we saw how well that went starting Crackers last time, plus as a former Bolt - they've got the book on him.

Montreal Les Habs Saturday - Cam Ward historically plays lights-out in the Bell (Molson!) Centre.

Winged Wheels (the best team on ice right now) the following day.

Cam Ward should get used to being #1 - and that includes the ability to win back-to-back games, regardless of the opponent.

Leighton is rounding in to good trade bait. Considering all that any other team would do with Mikey is trade him, why not? If it can bring in the elusive "puck-moving defenseman", let him roll.

Sometimes The Windshield. Sometimes The Bug(s).

Buffalo 8, Hurricanes 1

A rested streaking Sabres crew awaited a tired struggling Hurricane bunch.

They made it rain on Johnny Grahame and a hapless Carolina.

They can have it. Sometimes this is going to happen. We've had our games of putting up football numbers on opposing goaltenders.

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