Strange Team Promotions - Part IV

Just when you thought it couldn't get any weirder in Caneland, Wuf forwards me this link:

http://hurricanes.nhl.com/team/app/?service=page&page=NewsPage&articleid=402940

Apparently, the Hurricanes are now designing sandwiches for Harris Teeter. I shit you not. The first edition is apparently the "Walker 24". Honest to god, they are promoting a sandwich 'designed' by Scott Walker. The press report is silent as to the actual ingredients that make up the "Walker 24", but an inside source has informed me that the main ingredient is Genoa Salami. According the the tightly guarded Scott Walker recipe (which we here at C.O.I. have obtained), the secret to making the "Walker 24" is that you beat the holy hell out of the Salami, and slam it to the ground. You must then wait 5 minutes before you can put it on the bread.

Now you 3 faithful readers know how we roll (no pun intended) here at C.O.I. This story got me and the Wuf thinking. We just knew there had to be other entrants into the sandwich making promo. Specifically, there had to be some rejected sandwich ideas. So I did some digging. And lo and behold, through some super-secret inside informants, I managed to get the scoop. I can't reveal my anonymous sources, but it turns out, there were a couple of not-so-great sandwich submissions from the lockerroom. So here, in another C.O.I. exclusive, we would like to share a couple of the more interesting rejected sandwich ideas.

The first rejected sandwich idea was 'the Wizard' by Ray Whitney. Apparently, it consisted of a little mayo, a little mustard, a little lettuce and a lot of ham served on short bread.

The next was a creation submitted by Jim Rutherford. It was called the "Craig Adams". According to the taste testers, it was not a great hoagie, just a mediocre grinder. What made this sandwich notable was that Harris Teeter wasn't going to charge anything for it. They were just going to give it away for "future considerations".

An anonymous submission was also recieved and rejected. It was called the "Johnny Grahame". Apparently, the recipe was a bottle of Tequila sandwiched between two Hooters girls. Sure, that submission may not be in line with Harris Teeter's target marketing image, but I've got to admit, I'd stand in line for that one every day at lunch.

There was also a submission by Cam Ward, called the "Glove Side High". It was rejected because the only ingredient was Swiss Cheese.

Then, there was the "Frank Kaberle". It was a toasted sub. It apparently had a lot of potential, but they eventually scrapped it because no matter how much they tried to get it right, it just kept getting burnt.

And finally, there was quite a buzz surrounding Rod Brind'amour's entry. It was called "The Ex Wife". But it didn't get very far. Not only was it bitter, but you had to pay for the sandwich while someone else got to eat it.

So there you have it: the rejected Hurricane Sandwiches of 08/09. During our research, we also found out that this promotion also takes place elsewhere in the NHL, and we managed to get a list of rejected sandwich ideas from other teams around the league. But that is a post for another day.

Hey Bandwagoners! How'd THAT Work for You?

Don't you just love the bandwagoners? I know I do.

With roughly 3 minutes left on the clock, the Canes were down 2-0 against the Bruins. The next thing you know, there are loads of B-wagoners jumping up and running (some literally) to the exits. I'd like to think they were fleeing the arena as some sort of show of support in the team, but while I may be ignorant, I ain't THAT ignorant. Some people just don't have faith.

So anyway, there I sit, yelling "It AIN'T OVER PEOPLE!!!" to no avail. The wagoners continue to flee. I turned and said to the Swede, "I'm gonna laugh my ass off if the Canes tie it up" [or some other combination of words to that effect]. When the clock got down to around 2 minutes left, there were even more people heading for the exits. I thought to myself, "Self: I'm gonna wet your pants if the Canes manage to pull this out..." For some reason, I just had a feeling that something worth waiting for was going to happen. The potential was certainly there. Maybe the Canes would rip off a late miracle like they did against Jersey in '06. Or maybe Timmy Gleason was gonna pick up Ference (ala the glorious Horton slam) and smack that genetic mutant Zdeno Chara over the head with him. Or maybe somebody would pot a nice goal and Timmy Thomas [that's pronounced Tim-Wye Toe-Mahss in Kaitonese] would go ballistic, shatter the glass, and rampage through the crowd; smacking fans like Patrick Swayze in "Roadhouse" until he was finally subdued by a tranquilizer dart fired by a crack RBC sniper from the spotlight platform hanging from the catwalk above. Okay, maybe the first two were a bit of a stretch, but that last one was always a possibility. Anyway...

Flash forward. About 1:03 left, and the Wizard decided to magic a puck up in behind Timmy Thomas. The crowd roared its approval. Well, perhaps I should say: What was left of the crowd roared its approval. At this point, I could feel the tingle. However, Thomas didn't go Godzilla over Tokyo like I thought he would. The suspense was getting thick.

Flash forward. But not far. With about :42 seconds left, lightning struck. Erik Cole decides he can't stand the thought of Ray Whitney getting all the glory and pots the tying goal. The crowd went nuts. Much to my chagrin, Tim Thomas did not.

Of course, what ensued was an exciting overtime; followed by a disappointing shoot-out. However, I couldn't help but smile all the way back to my truck (which, due to the horrific state of RBC parking logistics, was parked in the outer reaches somewhere between Fuquay and Sanford). I wondered what those bandwagoners must've thought when they got to the minivan, jumped into the drivers seat while bitching about the loss, turned on 99.9 [the Fan], and caught Kaiton announcing the start of overtime. And later, a shoot-out.

Perhaps the type of fan that runs for the exits with 3 minutes to play doesn't care about the outcome of the game. Or perhaps these type fans just get their jollies thinking their the big winners in the race out of the parking lot. Either way, I can't help but hope that they felt some measure of disappointment and/or regret upon learning that owing to their lack of faith, they missed an opportunity to witness a very rare and exciting sports comeback moment.

This is one of the reasons why I never leave early. I support the guys to the end; win or lose. That last 1:03 in regulation night was one of those moments in Canes history that will be remembered and retold by the hardcore for years to come. And I am proud to say that my retelling of that story will begin: "I was right there in section 1** watching when Cole..." rather than: "I was just turning out of the parking lot when I heard Chuck say..."

The moral of this story is simple: Stick around bandwagoners. Sometimes, good things come to those that wait.